10 Classic Ian Holloway Quotes
"Ollie" has become famous for his quirky quotes and quips, all done in that cheeky west country accent.
Most are obviously football-related, some are just rambling thoughts on everyday life, many of which do actually make some sort of sense, whilst some are just completely hat-stand.
One things for sure though - they're always entertaining.
Anyway, here's 10 of our favourites...
No.1 "To put it in gentleman's terms, if you've been out for a night and you're looking for a young lady and you pull one, you've done what you set out to do. We didn't look our best today but we've pulled.
Some weeks the lady is good looking and some weeks they're not. Our performance today would have been not the best looking bird but at least we got her in the taxi.
She may not have been the best looking lady we ended up taking home but it was still very pleasant and very nice, so thanks very much and let's have coffee."
September 2003, Ollie tries to explain his QPR team's poor performance against Chesterfield.
No.2 "Right now, everything is going wrong for me - if I fell in a barrel of boobs, I'd come out sucking my thumb!"
2004, during a bad run of results for QPR.
No.3 "I want to try and spread the support with my Bristol connection. Rovers are in the bottom division so why can't I try and convert some of them into Argyle fans? We're in the West Country so it's not that far away. Only two and a half hours away in a slow car, an hour and a half in a fast one - or 10 minutes in a rocket! As long as you aimed it right, you'd be down here really quickly. Don't land it on the pitch, though, because you'd ruin it!"
His thoughts on how to increase Plymouth's home attendances back in 2007.
No.4 "If you're a burglar, it's no good poncing about outside somebody's house, looking good with your swag bag ready. Just get in there, burgle them and come out. I don't advocate that obviously, it's just an analogy."
October 2009, Ollie on his Blackpool team's performance after a 4-1 loss to Crystal Palace.
No.5 "Every dog has its day - and today is woof day! Today I just want to bark."
April 2004 after his QPR team seal promotion at Sheffield Wednesday.
No. 6 "He's six foot something, fit as a flea, good looking - he's got to have something wrong with him. Hopefully he's hung like a hamster - that would make us all feel better. Having said that, my missus has got a pet hamster at home, and his cock's massive..."
Talking about Cristiano Ronaldo for some reason whilst boss of Leicester City during the 2007-08 season.
No.7 "I love the big man, absolutely brilliant. Some of the films were a bit dodgy. That one where he was diving off a cliff, he climbed back up to the top and his hair was still immaculate and he wasn't even wet... and for me that's why he's the King."
Holloway discusses his love of Elvis back in 2007.
No.8 "I couldn't be more chuffed if I were a badger at the start of the mating season."
A rather happy back in 2006 after his QPR team's victory over Cardiff City.
No.9 "I don't see the problem with footballers taking their shirts off after scoring a goal. They enjoy it and the young ladies enjoy it, too. I suppose that's one of the main reasons women come to football games, to see the young men take their shirts off. Of course, they'd have to go and watch another game because my lads are as ugly as sin".
Holloway turns his thoughts to goal celebrations and the role of female fans.
No.10 "There was a woman in it who was quite well-endowed and two boys who used to get drunk and have a fight - it had everything in it for me."
Keeping himself busy during his extended gardening leave in November 2008 by thinking back to the Dukes of Hazzard.
