| TEAM | 'CELEB' | OCCUPATION |
| Accrington Stanley | | |
| | David Lloyd | Cult cricketing commentating crackpot |
| Arsenal | | |
| | Fidel Castro | Cuban Leader |
| | Robin Cook | Politician |
| | Tom Cruise | Tiny Actor |
| | President Kagame | President of Rwanda |
| | Paul Kaye | Comedian (Pennis, Strutter) |
| | Aleksander Kwasniewski | President of Poland |
| | Osama bin Laden | Terrorist Overlord |
| | Prince Harry | Prince |
| | King Olav V | King of Norway |
| | Geoffrey Palmer | 'Stuffy' Actor (e.g. Sausage-scoffing doctor in Fawlty Towers) |
| | Ian Poulter | Whacky-clothed Golfer |
| | The Queen | The Queen |
| | The Queen Mum | Mother of the Queen |
| | David Soul | Hutch |
| | Phil Tufnell | Cricketer |
| | Taufa'ahau Tupou IV | King of Tonga |
| | Reggie Yates | Radio 1 DJ |
| Aston Villa | | |
| | Ian Bell | Cricketer |
| | Alan Davies | Comedian |
| | Lennie Godber | Jailbird |
| | Tom Hanks | Actor |
| | Nigel Kennedy | Violinist |
| | Pauline McLynn | Mrs Doyle (Father Ted) |
| | Ozzy Osborne | Bat-munching Heavy Metal Singer |
| | Prince William | Prince |
| | Mark Williams | Comic Actor |
| Barnsley | | |
| | Dickie Bird | Umpire |
| | Darren Gough | Cricketer / Dancer |
| | Michael Parkinson | Broadcaster |
| Birmingham City | | |
| | Jasper Carrot | Comedian |
| Blackburn Rovers | | |
| | Jim Bowen | Comedian (old school) |
| | Jack Straw | Politician |
| Bolton Wanderers | | |
| | Vernon Kay | Massive TV Presenter |
| | Amir Khan | Boxer |
| | Paddy McGuinness | Comic Actor |
| Brentford | | |
| | Richard Archer | Singer (Hard-Fi) |
| | Phil Collins | Middling middle of the road popster |
| | Sarah Cracknell | Singer (St Etienne) |
| | Cameron Diaz (*5) | Actress |
| | Greg Dyke | TV Broadcasting Big Cheese |
| | Dean Gaffney (aka Robbie Jackson) | Actor (Eastenders) |
| | Dan Tana | Hollywood Restaurateur |
| Brighton HA | | |
| | Des Lynam | Sports Presenter |
| | Fat Boy Slim | DJ |
| | Mark Williams (*3) | Comic Actor |
| Burnley | | |
| | Alistair Campbell | Spin Doctor |
| Bury | | |
| | Danny Boyle | Film Director |
| | Neville Neville (your face is a mess) | Daddy Neville |
| Chasetown | | |
| | Frank Carson | Old Skool Comedian |
| Charlton Athletic | | |
| | Gary Bushell | 'Journalist' |
| | Jim Davidson | Presenter of Big Break |
| | Steve Davis | Snooker Champ |
| | Michael Grade | Chief Executive of ITV |
| | Karl Howman | Actor (Jacko in Brush Strokes) |
| | Steve Rider | Sports presenter |
| | Lee Ryan | Boy Band Singer |
| | Glenn Tilbrook | Musician |
| Chelsea | | |
| | Damon Albarn | Singer |
| | Richard Attenborough | Director / Actor |
| | David Baddiel | Comedian |
| | Sebastian Coe | Athlete/Politician |
| | Tim Lovejoy | Broadcaster |
| | John Major | ex Prime Minister |
| | Alec Stewart | Cricketer |
| | Suggs | Singer |
| Chesterfield | | |
| | Paul Burrell | Royal Butler |
| | Jo Guest | Model |
| Coventry City | | |
| | Eddie Jordan | F1 Motor Racing Owner |
| | Jimmy Hill | Large-chinned Football Pundit |
| | Vince Hill | Jimmy's Brother and 60's Popstar |
| | Richard Keys | Hairy-handed Football Presenter |
| | Brian McFadden | Irish Pop 'star' |
| | Alistair McGowan | Impressionist |
|
| Crystal Palace |
| | Martin Bashir | Journalist (infamous Lady Di and Wacko Jacko interviews) |
| | Bob 'the Cat' Bevan | After-Dinner Speaker |
| | Jim Bob | Bonkers 90's indie star (Carter the Unstoppable Sex Machine) |
| | Jo Brand | Comedienne |
| | Mark Butcher | Cricketer |
| | Harry Carpenter | Legendary Boxing Commentator |
| | Ronnie Corbett | Comedian |
| | Roger de Courcey & Nookie Bear | Philosophers |
| | Windsor Davies | Actor (Never the Twain) |
| | Peter Davison | The 5th Doctor Who, Singer of 'Button Moon' theme tune |
| | Kevin Day | Comedian |
| | Harry Enfield | Comedian |
| | Tim Gudgeon | Grandstand football scores announcer |
| | Nigel Harman | Actor (Eastenders) |
| | Roy Hudd | Comedian |
| | Sean Hughes | Comedian |
| | Sir Bernard Ingham | Politician |
| | Eddie Izzard | Comedian |
| | David 'Kid' Jensen | 80's DJ |
| | Daniel Day Lewis | Actor |
| | Neil Morrissey | Actor |
| | Rob Newman | Comedian (the Mary White House Experience) |
| | Bill Nighy | Actor |
| | John Peinnar | Polictical Commentator |
| | Mark Steel | Comedian |
| | Paul Weller | Top Mod |
| | James Whale | Radio DJ |
| | Nicholas Witchell | Posh BBC Newsreader |
| | Matthew Wright | TV Presenter |
| | Bill Wyman | Rolling Stone |
|
| Derby County |
| | Kim Barnett | England cricket 'rebel' |
| | Peter Baxter | Cricket commentator |
| | Margaret Beckett | MP |
| | Tim Brooke-Taylor | Goody |
| | Nicholas Burns | Actor (Nathan Barley) |
| | Mike Cattermole | Horse-Racing Presenter |
| | Timothy Dalton | Former 007 |
| | Ivan Gaskill | MOTD interviewer |
| | Simon Groom | Farmer / Blue Peter Presenter |
| | Geoff Hoon | Politician |
| | Mike Ingham | Radio 5 football bod |
| | Robert Lindsay | Actor ('Wolfie' Citizen Smith) |
| | Kevin Lloyd | Actor ('Tosh' from The Bill) |
| | Tracy Shaw | Actress (Maxine from Coro) |
| | Kelli Young | Liberty X 'singer' |
| Doncaster Rovers | | |
| | Jeremy Clarkson | Petrolheaded TV presenter |
| | Paul Daniels | Magical millionaire husband of the delightful Debbie McGhee |
| Everton | | |
| | Paul McCartney | Singer Song Writer |
| | Sylvester Stallone | Rocky Balboa |
| Forest Green Rovers | | |
| | Jack Russell | Eccentric Former Cricketer |
| Hartlepool | | |
| | Lord Burlison | Trade Unionist and er, Lord |
| | Stuart Drummond | H'Angus the Monkey/Mayor |
| | Janick Gers | Songwriter/Guitarist (Iron Maiden) |
| | Meat Loaf | Singer |
| | Peter Mandelson | MP |
| | Phil Middlemiss | Actor (Des Barnes, Corrie) |
| | Ridley Scott | Film Director |
| | Reg Smythe | Catoonist ('Andy Capp') |
| | Jeff Stelling | Genius football Presenter |
| Huddersfield Town | | |
| | Patrick Stewart | Actor (aka Jean Luc Picard, Star Trek) |
|
| Leeds Utd | | |
| | Kaiser Chiefs | Band |
| | Nasser Hussain | Cricketer |
| | Chris Moyles | Radio 1 DJ |
|
| Leicester City |
| | Family | 60's rock band |
| | Engelbert Humperdinck | 60's singer |
| | David Icke | Former Sports Presenter turned reptilian humanoid discoverer |
| | Lee Jobber | Bare-chested 23 stone super-fan. |
| | Martin Johnson | Egg-chasing World Cup winning captain. |
| | Kasabian | Top Band |
| | Rusty Lee | Hysterical former TV Chef. Now wife of Jimmy Nail. |
| | Gary Lineker | Jug-eared host of Matach of the Day and legendary goal hanger. |
| | Bill Maynard | Actor (Oh No, It's Selwyn Froggitt!) |
| | Mark Morrison | Singer ("Return of the Mack") |
| | David Neilson | Actor (Roy Cropper, Corrie) |
| | Gary Newbon | TV Sports Presenter |
| | Nicholas Parsons | Sale of the Century host |
| | showaddywaddy | 1970's Teddy Boys Band |
| | Willie Thorne | Slap-headed Snooker Ace |
|
| Liverpool | | |
| | Ian Broudie | Singer |
| | Dr Dre | Rapper |
| | Colin Murray | Radio/TV Presenter |
| | DJ Spoony | DJ |
| | Jimmy Tarbuck | Professional Scouser |
| Luton | | |
| | Eric Morecambe | Comic Legend |
| | Nick Owen | Broadcaster |
| Man City | | |
| | Nigel Bond | Snooker Legend / King of Darley Dale |
| | Liam Gallagher | Oasis singer |
| | Noel Gallagher | Oasis guitarist |
| | Kevin Kennedy (aka Curly) | Actor (Coro) |
| | Eddie Large | Large Comedian |
| Man Utd | | |
| | Richard Ashcroft | Verve Frontman |
| | Michael Atherton | England Cricket Captain |
| | Ian Brown | Stone Roses King Monkey |
| | Tim Burgess | Charlatans Frontman |
| | Mark Charnock | Actor (Marlon Dingle) |
| | Terry Christian | Yoof Presenter (the Word) |
| | Steve Coogan | Alan Partridge |
| | Angus Deayton | Mancunian (yeah, right) |
| | Ulrika Jonsson | C list Celeb / Friend of Sven |
| | Mani | Stone Roses / Primal Scream legend |
| | Ian McShane | Lovejoy |
| | Steve McFadden | Phil Mitchell |
| | JAmes Nesbitt | Actor |
| | Gary Rhodes | Spikey haired TV Chef |
| | Michael Le Vell | Actor (Coro, Kevin Webster) |
| | John Virgo | Miserable Snooker Player |
| | Russell Watson | Opera Singer |
| | Sean Wilson | Actor (Coro, Kevin Webster) |
| Mansfield Town | | |
| | Alvin Stardust | Singer |
| Middlesborough | | |
| | Chris Rea | Singer |
| | Bob Mortimer | Comedian |
| Millwall | | |
| | Danny Baker | Overweight Gobby Radio/TV Presenter |
| | Rod Liddle | Media Bloke |
| | Ian Wright | ex Footballer |
| Newcastle Utd | | |
| | Ant'n'Dec | Cheeky TV Presenters |
| | Tony Blair | ex Prime Minister |
| | Brian Blessed | Shouty-crackers Actor |
| | Steve Harmison | Homesick Cricketer |
| | Tim Healy | Actor |
| | John McCririck | Horse-Racing Expert |
| Norwich City | | |
| | Delia Smith | TV Chef |
| Oxford Utd | | |
| | Timmy Mallet | "Mallet's Mallet" Presenter and friend of Roland Rat |
| Peterborough | | |
| | Adrian Durham | Talksport DJ |
| Plymouth | | |
| | Michael Foot (*1) | Politician |
| Port Vale | | |
| | Phil 'the Power' Taylor | Darts legend |
| | Robbie Williams | Singer |
| QPR | | |
| | Pete Doherty | Skinny Singer |
| | Ashley Giles | Cricketer |
| Rochdale | | |
| | Tommy Cannon | Comedian |
| | Lisa Stansfield | Singer |
| Rotherham | | |
| | Barry Chuckle | A Chuckle Brother |
| | Paul Chuckle | A Chuckle Brother |
| Sheffield United | | |
| | Sean Bean | Actor |
| | Joe Elliot | Long-haired 'glam-rock' singer (Def Leppard) |
| | Paul Heaton | Singer (Housemartions, Beautiful South) |
| | Michael Palin (*2) | Comic Actor |
| Sheffield Wednesday | | |
| | Arctic Monkeys | Band |
| | David Blunkett | Politician |
| | Tommy Craig (aka Tommy Harris) (*4) | Actor (Coro) |
| | Harrisons | Indie group. |
| | Roy Hattersley | Politician |
| | Jermaine Jackson | Singer |
| | Jon McClure | Singer (Reverend and the Makers) |
| | Michael Palin (*2) | Comic Actor |
| | Michael Vaughan | Ashes-winning Cricket Captain |
| Southend | | |
| | Alison Moyet | Big Singer |
| Southampton | | |
| | Craig David | Singer |
| Stoke City | | |
| | Nick Hancock | Comedian |
| Sunderland | | |
| | Steve Cram | Athlete |
| | Brendan Foster | Athlete |
| Swindon Town | | |
| | Willie Carson | Jockey |
| Torquay | | |
| | Helen Chamberlain | Broadcaster |
| | Peter Cook | Comic legend |
| Tottenham Hotspur | | |
| | Chas'n'Dave | Margate-loving Pop Combo |
| | Danny Kelly | See Danny Baker |
| | Richard Littlejohn | See Danny Kelly |
| | Jo Whiley | Radio 1 DJ |
| Tranmere Rovers | | |
| | Ray Stubbs | ESPN Anchorman |
| Watford | | |
| | Elton John | Singer |
| West Brom | | |
| | Adrian Chiles | TV Presenter |
| | Frank Skinner | Comedian |
| Wolves | | |
| | Jimmy Page | Rock Legend |
| | Robert Plant | Rock Legend |
|
| West Ham Utd |
| | Kriss Akabusi | Loud Athlete |
| | Nick Berry | Actor ('Wicksy') |
| | Russell Brand | Motor-mouthed TV Presenter |
| | Frank Bruno | Heavyweight Boxer and friend of 'Arry |
| | Todd Carty | Actor - Tucker Jenkins, Mark Fowler |
| | John Cleese | Basil Fawlty |
| | James Corden | Comic Actor - Gavin and Stacey |
| | Noel Edmonds | Bearded friend of Mr Blobby |
| | David Essex | Singer |
| | Perry Fenwick | Eastenders Actor - Billy Mitchell |
| | Graham Gooch | Cricketer |
| | Leslie Grantham | Actor - Dirty Den |
| | Lee Hurst | Comedian |
| | Phil Jupitus | Comedian |
| | Ross Kemp | Slap-headed Actor |
| | Matt Lorenzo | Sky Sports Presenter |
| | Jo O'Meara | S Club 7 Singer |
| | Ray Winstone | the Daddy |