Moron! Wanka! Winterslag!
It could be a frank exchange of views between a manager and a club's owner, but in actual fact it's a few names from our list of the finest club names in football...
So, in alphabetical order....
Not a brand of Belgian Abbey beer, but an Italian club from Bergamo.
Or to give them their full title, Club Social, Cultural y Deportivo Blooming.
Another Scottish company works team, this one formed from the employees of the Burntisland Shipbuilding Company back in 1919 and still going strong in the Kingdom Caledonian Football League (unlike the actual shipyard, which closed in 1969). And, believe it or not, they still stick to their pre-match tradition of hurling a bottle of champagne at the changing room building from a nearby tree.
East of Scotland League outfit. Winners of the East of Scotland Consolation Cup in 1921. A cup given to the team who scored the most 'consolation goals' in the league that season. Probably.
Unfortunately, after the public sector cuts of recent years they've only be able to field 9 players in matches. And if they think that hard-pressed taxpayers are going to fund their shorts...
Santa Cruz based side, who compete with The Strongest for Bolivia's toughest sounding name.
Translating as Colonel Bolognesi, and sounding like some possible Italian rival to that bloke who started KFC, they're a Peruvian club from the southern city of Tacna and named after one of the country's military heroes, Francisco Bolognesi.
Often overlooked in favour of Peru's Wanka, but we actually give this one the nod as the best club name ever.
The daddy of comedy football club names.
Previously known as FC Holy Paul, they were re-branded as FC Englebert in recognition of their main sponsor - unfortunately a tyre company rather than Humpledink. They've changed their name since to TP Mazembe but still have a reference to Englebert on the club badge.
The club are now best known for becoming the first non-European or South American club to reach the final of FIFA's Club World Cup, when they beat Brazilian side Internacional 2:0 in the 2010 semi but then lost to Inter Milan in the final.
There's only one thing better than this Norwegian club's name, and that's the name of their stadium... Fartbana.
Scottish football team who currently play in Division 1 of the East of Scotland Football League but who have applied, unsuccessfully, to join the Scottish Football League four times since the mid 1960's. The Gala part of their name comes from the town they're from... Galashiels. As for the mystical-sounding Fairydean, who knows, but the atmosphere of this friendly club was best summed up back in 1997 by the club chaplain, Father Edward McCrilly... "The Fairydean - a great bunch of lads."
Golspie is a picturesque coastal village with a caravan park and golf course nearby. There's a Kart Race Track too. And by jingo, the local boys can play.
Founder member's of the South Korean K-League and winner's of the inaugural championship back in 1983.
Formed as TP Mazembe back in 1939 by Benedictine monks, they were re-branded as FC Holy Paul in the 1940s and have subsequently changed their name since to the equally glamorous FC Engelbert.
Highland League side formed way back in 1903, and as the name suggests, were the football team of the locomotive factory. We imagine they still turn up every Saturday with diesel-splashed faces, great big baggy shorts, a couple of leather "Caseys" and a loaf of Hovis under one arm. We'd be disappointed to find out different.
Owned by the infamous CONCACAF President, Jack Warner, Joe Public play their home games at the Marvin Lee Stadium, not to be confused with the Lee Marvin Stadium, which probably doesn't exist, but should.
South of Scotland League side. Wigtown is the larger of the two, whereas Bladnoch was home to a former distillery and creamery whose workers provided many of the players. According to Wikipedia the clubs motto is "moving forward to achieve our goals". Makes the club sound like the most boring seminar in history.
Another fantastically named Bolivian team, this one based in the city of Cochabamba. The name is derived from the country's first commercial aviator. When Wilstermann died the boss of Bolivia's national airline requested that the city's airport and football team be renamed in honour of him.
KFC standing for Koninklijke Football Club, rather than an unhealthy alliance with Colonel Saunders and his mates. Unfortunately they merged with Waterschei SV Thor Genk in 1988 to create Racing Genk, which doesn't quite have the same comedy appeal as KFC Winterslag.
Hailing from the Japanese city of Mito, they were originally named Prima Ham FC, but rebranded in 1997, Hollyhock being the family crest of one of the city's famous clans.
Also known as Cape Coast Mysterious Dwarfs, they were one of the first football clubs to be formed in Ghana in the early 1900's (along with the Venomous Vipers and the Sekondi Eleven Wise). They're well known as a tough little outfit but apparently they're vulnerable in the air at set pieces.
Old Boys of Basel or Young Boys of Bern? You decide.
Named after the founders favourite Brazilian footballer, probably.
See Mito Hollyhock.
Ok, so on it's own this Nigerian Premier League team doesn't sound as good as some of the others, but just imagine if they merged with another Nigerian team from our list, Wikki Tourists FC...
Not very crack Belgian outfit from West Flanders.
If the players of the Ballweavers sound as good as their name suggests then they must be just about unstoppable.
Formed in 1992 following the merger between Supermarine F.C. and Swindon Athletic F.C. they came to prominence in Octoober 2010 with a famous 4-3 victory over Bath City to claim a place in the 1st round of the FA Cup.
Bolivia's second most successful club after Club Bolivar.
Peruvian club from the southern city of Arequipa. Created by the employees of a laundry firm (hence the name) they started to recruit non-employees and managed to hit the big time - gaining promotion to the top tier of Peruvian football (the Primera Division Peruana) in 2006.
Nigerian Premier League outfit. A decent name, but see Shooting Stars FC for further explanation as to why they really make the list.
Named after the famous Rhineland city of Worms. Apparently.
Young Boys of Berne, Old Boys of Basel, Young Fellows of Zurich. What's going on here with those crafty Swiss folk?
Zurich club from the lower reaches of the Swiss football leagues, they were formed in 1992 when Young Fellows Zurich merged with and SC Italiana Juventus Zurigo.